Change is  hard.  Letting go of old friends, making new ones, changing my attitudes, my judgments, and my world view.  In the process of all these changes, my house shatters; my vision of myself is no longer the same.  And...now I must begin to rebuild a new house, a new attitude, adopt a new set of beliefs, and take another step in my new clothes and from my new house.  I feel tired today from all these changes.  Of all the people I know, change is hard for me.  It is exciting and new, that is for sure, but to rebuild myself again...today it seems like to big a job for me.  I discovered last night that I don't fight fair.  I guess I was still in the process of thinking that a fight is to be won:   not an educational experience where I might learn something new about myself and learn to listen in a new way.  At my age, fighting is not a worthy expenditure of time.  Listening and learning are valuable investments of my time.  I am not as insecure that I have to defend myself anymore:  my ego is strong enough for the learning that I need to do to happen.  So I am in the process of changing.  Who will reform out of these changes?  I can hardly wait to find out.